Belonging: Remembering Ourselves Home
✍️ Turner, Toko-PaA practical and poetic guide to healing personal estrangement through dreamwork, myth, and ancestral competencies.
Winning a Gold 2017 Nautilus Award, this 260-page paperback frame exile as a necessary initiation into authenticity. Turner draws on her experience as a Midwife of the Psyche to address the absence of belonging. The chapters progress from identifying false belonging and inner conflict toward practical integration, highlighting concepts such as the inner marriage, holy longing, and the invitational presence. By combining Sufism and Jungian thought, the work frames emotional pain and grief as allies in building community and honoring nature.
Published in December 2017 by Her Own Room Press, this Canadian work sits at the intersection of modern Mind, Body, Spirit literature, Western Jungian psychology, and Sufi mystical traditions.
Praise for this book
“Belonging is something quite extraordinary. It's more than just a book; it's an experience. As I read Toko-pa's writing, I found myself being transported, not to some distant place, but to my deepest core. Belonging is a mirror to our true face, revealing the exiled threads of our being so that we may gently re-weave them back into the greater fabric of which we are all a part. This is a book that provides living nourishment for these times and will be a classic for decades to come.”
“An exquisitely crafted journey that explores the deep longings of the soul, the mysterious workings of our dreams, the bittersweet wisdom of the orphaned self and the losses of our lineage that we would rather ignore. Toko-pa Turner speaks with poetry and practicality, pure compassion and profound integrity to the heart of what it means to belong to ourselves, to our people, to our communities and to the earth. Belonging is the book I have been longing to read all my life.”
“Certain people invite you into an experience that will alter your world view forever. They have gone so deep, searched so thoroughly, traversed territories that most would shun, and then they return and lay their soul at your feet. Toko-pa is one such individual and this book is her soul made visible. She reaches her hand out to you and asks you to take a journey with her. If you are ready, take her hand and prepare to grow.”
📝 Description: Belonging: Remembering Ourselves Home
📑 What's inside
- 1. Something Greater
- 2. Origins of Estrangement
- 3. The Death Mother
- 4. False Belonging
- 5. The Inner Marriage
- 6. Initiations by Exile
- 7. The Symbolic Life
- 8. Trekking the Creative Wild
- 9.The Dark Guests
- 10. Pain as Sacred Ally
- 11.Holy Longing
- 12. Competencies of Belonging
- 13. Handmaking a Life
- 14. Bearing the Pleasure
- 15. The Invitational Presence
- 16. Storywells and Songlines
- 17. Tending a Village
- 18. Reciprocity with Nature
- 19. Conclusion
💎 Expert review
📖 Why choose it
Why this book is worth reading
Readers who feel a persistent, quiet ache of alienation in an interconnected world will find profound solace here. Turner offers a vital reframing of personal isolation not as a defect, but as a powerful initiation into authenticity. Those seeking to heal deep wounds through the lens of ancient practices and dream wisdom will appreciate her guidance. It is for anyone tired of chasing belonging as a destination, ready instead to reclaim it as an inherent skill. This book provides the tools to stop searching outside and start remembering home within, fostering genuine connection by healing the self.
⭐ Reader reviews
Reader rating
Turner’s award-winning text is a gentle yet potent guide for the spiritually weary. By treating belonging as an innate competency, she offers fresh hope to those stuck in cycles of exclusion. However, this book does not suit readers seeking rigid dogma, quick-fix solutions, or purely academic sociological analysis. It requires patience and a willingness to engage with myth and dreams on a visceral level. Those expecting concrete instructions for social integration may find the introspective nature too abstract. It is best for those ready for an emotional and spiritual excavation rather than a practical manual for community building.
❓ Frequently asked questions
📖 Who should read this
If you've ever felt adrift, isolated, or yearned for a deeper connection to yourself and the world, this book is for you. It's an invitation to explore the roots of your disconnection and discover a profound path to belonging that originates from within.
🎯 Key themes and symbolism
Belonging as an Inner Skill
The book fundamentally shifts the understanding of belonging from an external search to an intrinsic ability. It argues that true belonging isn't found in a specific location or group, but cultivated from within. Turner provides readers with tools and perspectives to develop this inner competency, transforming their relationship with self and the world around them.
Healing the Wound of Estrangement
Turner delves into the pervasive feelings of unworthiness, alienation, and anxiety that disconnect individuals from their communities and their true selves. She masterfully reframes these experiences of 'exile' not as failures, but as essential initiations. This perspective empowers readers to confront their deepest wounds, paving the way for profound personal healing and reintegration.
Ancestral Wisdom for Reconnection
Drawing deeply from timeless myths, ancestral narratives, and the symbolic language of dreams, the book offers a rich tapestry of wisdom. It introduces ancient practices designed to help individuals remember and restore their inherent sense of belonging. These competencies provide a practical framework for integrating the book's insights into daily life, fostering authentic connection.
📜 Historical context
📚 Glossary
- Belonging
- Estrangement
- Exile
📔 Questions to reflect on
- Reflect on a time you felt a profound sense of belonging. What were the internal and external circumstances?
- Consider an experience of 'exile' or alienation in your life. How might this experience serve as an initiation into a deeper aspect of yourself?
- What ancestral practices or stories from your lineage might offer guidance on cultivating a stronger sense of belonging today?
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